The Grundle Perspective

Towards what?

2008-01-02T13:10:00.000-05:00

Now within the eighth year of the New Millennium and without a Mission. A Purpose. There is Passion, mind you. That was never lacking. We were built on Passion. Bertrand, never short on vision nor spirit has desired things more concrete this year. Less adjectives and superlatives.

Xenophobia and isolation have been a side effect since the inception of The Institute. Subterranean Labs and an impressive bar have fostered some fantastic innovations, but however altruistic the intentions, last year was a blur for most involved. Things got done, but no marks were made.

It Has Come to Our Attention ...

2007-08-16T23:41:00.000-04:00

... that the majority of the 21st Century census, meaning those born of the latter 1980's, have a lack of perspective and compassion. This was brought to our attention amongst a usual gathering at the 'Cellar'.
... My un-educated thesis states that, 'we should take this chance, to turn things around'.

I have to reiterate that I have begun to spend a great deal of time with Mr. Elliott, the recent divorcee, as it seems he has alot more 'free-time' on his hands.
I am not one of philosophy, though I suppose everyone should have their own 'Lebensphilosophie' [philosophy of life], but I know the basics:

Thanks to H. Jackson Brown Jr., who put it best in his collection of 'Life's Little Instructions'. Look over this catalogue of suggested instructions, then return here for an in depth scope analysis.

My R.E.M.

2007-08-12T16:27:00.000-04:00

Not referring to the popular American Rock Band, R.E.M.

I spent the better part of my Sunday morning reallocating the thoughts, scenes, and one liners from my excursion Friday night. Which raises the question, 'where did Saturday go?' My fry cook suggested I log as many events as I can in ascending order from the present, in the form of caricatures. I, of course, thanked York for the advice but regretfully declined the notion. I lack the ability to functionably access both sides of my brain to analyze and be creative - it's one or the other. With that said ... Here is what I know:

FRIDAY ...
Sometime after my midday shift Mr.Bertrand and Mr.Elliott exercised the enthusiasm to go fishing. Without recourse I accepted the invitation. From the late evening into the early morning of the next day I progressively grew fonder of the bait fish odor, which by my logic implies that it was, indeed, a successful expedition.

'There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot.'

Pre - SUNDAY ...
My receptionist had recorded an abrupt phone message from York, indicating an influx of customers, which meant he needed my assistance. Without hesitation I threw myself into the barkeep and kept the consumers at bay whilst we finished a robust order for Dr. Pufs' staff. By supper I was ready to retire. I had relieved myself of the night shift to locate a social life but, undoubtably, I did not find one and again I was lingering amongst a few regulars, to include Mr. Elliott, in a neighboring city. After a few glasses of vino and a lack luster conversation about politics, I found myself on a strange couch with a sheepdog.

Present SUNDAY ...
Like I mentioned earlier, I spent the better part of today organizing previous events. I'm a true believer in having a grasp on your life in most respects. What can be said if I can't even recall 48 hours. As a disclaimer, this was neither drug or alcohol induced, rather I believe it to be the by product of my R.E.M. - Rapid Eye Movement. Doctors have yet to pinpoint the effect of your eye's moving too rapidly, so if this is the case then I would have inadvertently missed the majority of my reality.

'There is only one thing about which I am certain, and this is that there is very little about which one can be certain.'

I'm Knew

2007-08-02T12:32:00.000-04:00

Let me take this first prose as an opportunity to extend my deepest appreciation for the chance to become a part of such a great 'Institution'. When Mr. Elliott came to me with the invitation, I must say, I was rather reluctant - unsure really if I had what it took. After my initiation, however, I felt much more comfortable and at home here at the Pufs Institute. It is so delicately nestled in the grounds of GrundleWood Manor; a true testament to the dedication of those within the Institute's boundaries.

My name is Edwyn, meaning 'rich friend'. And may I interject to say that I have never been a rich friend to anyone, nor do I know any companions, friends, or have any such a relationship with a 'rich' person. On the other hand, I suppose the olde English name could be referring to a state of having a 'rich character', thus meaning I am a 'rich friend' in the sense of being of significant worth to a peer and/or counterpart ... Enough said.

I'm excited to say I found my calling here, with the help of Dr. Pufs and his admirable sidekick, Bertrand. A modest occupation, tending to the drunkards in the basement barkeep. The regulars offer a kind smile, respect, and moderate tips. The locals usually are the rambunctious ones, thinking they undoubtedly own the place due to their residency outside the manor. But most of all, I will admit, I enjoy the late night sit downs with Dr. Pufs, Bertrand and, more recently, Mr. Elliott, who was just divorced by his wife.

I'll have to get back though, as it seems happy hour is about to start ... I fear my inventory of the Buffel Flugels is low so I will have to conjure up a substitute without raising too much suspicion. -- Thanks again.

New Staff

2007-07-09T22:13:00.000-04:00

We have been lucky enough to enjoy the company of so many people throughout the years at The Institute and our newest staff member is no exception. Elliott, no doubt weary from the extended hours that Dr. Pufs and Bertrand have spent at the bar this year due to engineering issues in the lab, hired a strapping young man to help out filling the glasses and scrubbing the deep fryer.

To use the word "character" would be an understatement. Ah, the tales we have heard late at night of the new barkeeps adventures in America. Oh... he's an entertainer. Whatever his name is.

An Early Frost

2007-01-07T13:47:00.000-05:00

Winter came early again this year. Thus furthering Dr.Puf's prediction that penguins, those illegitimate birds, have ultimate control. It came as no surprise really. When we returned to the Institute the morning dew became the morning frost, which inevitably became the reason for my obnoxiously early risings to ensure Dr. Puf's motor vehicle was pre-heated. He spoke about the possibility of an advancement in thermal-mectronics, an idea that would ensure a temperate climate within and beyond our walls.

I must say the vacation was nice, I always appreciate the tenderness Dr.Puf's Uncle expresses to myself and Bertrand. The simple pleasures of enjoying a well-garnished meal and a feeling of belongingness, not to say the Institute does not offer this, rather it is to say that it is 'different'.

I will be honest; I have become weary of the New Year. The constant discussion of time travel makes me dread the onset of a new calendar. I urged, with a bit of selfishness, Dr.Pufs to push past the corrupt bureaucrats and return to the 'old country'. I can't forget how pleasant the days were back then and how simplistic my routine.

From The Archives

2006-11-07T13:45:00.000-05:00

If I recall correctly this is from 1973 and shows Dr. Pufs awestruck at his newest creation. Of course he knew all of his ideas would work in one way or another; however in this instance he was surprised at how quickly the BioMechaniks 370L series prototype took to the finer idiosyncrasies of day to day life in the lab. After only two days "El",as he was called for a time, openly mocked Bertrand over the intercom for frequently calling down to the lab as he did asking where the Dijon was for his daily corned beef sandwiches.

A Long Halloween

2006-11-01T13:44:00.000-05:00

Once again, Halloween at The Institute involved the transformation of the main lab floors into Bertrand's faithful (with respect to his mind's eye) reproduction of Tesla's lab circa 1967.

The free energy was as always a welcome touch (as it has been since we began engaging it full time in 1978).

After the events of this summer we decided to abstain from any gravitational modifications, even though Dr. Puf's suggested that a slight tweak would in fact make the Halloween festivities last just a little longer.

Autumn

2006-10-26T13:44:00.000-04:00

Autumn at The Institute is an unforgettable time, eventually once one plows through the Octoberfest brew induced blackouts. For the past two weeks Elliott has been bringing in treats from home: apple cobblers, meat pies and gravies, and home brewed ales. Well actually the ales were brewed on site. We have a state of the art brewery on the premises. Bertrand insists that the aroma of fresh hops stirs his creativity.

Tiki Bars and High Density Soul Food

2006-09-12T13:43:00.000-04:00

It was my great pleasure to entertain the Institute's Brain Trust in Southern California when we met at that conference a while back. Since that time I have spent many a long night at The Institute engaged in in both theoretical diatribe and effusive ribaldry with those fellows (and special guests) over many many bottles of Elliott's finest private reserve scotch; however it was one night that began on Sunset Boulevard that stands out in my mind.
Now, it could take days to detail the adventures that took place on that night and no doubt Mr. Grundle, with his eloquence, might be better suited but let us merely start with the ingredients:
4 Scholars
34 Flaming Mai Tais
97 year old bartender
3.5 fried chickens
12 waffles
1 pint of syrup
1 eyepatch
2 costume capes
4 dancers

Mix well under a lunar eclipse. Add in two gay screenwriters and you get a night to remember.
-F. Hauch.

(MAG, how many Mexican Wrestling masks were there?)

The Mystic Knowledge of Frederick Hauch

2006-09-05T13:41:00.000-04:00

Self-proclaimed futurist Frederick Hauch first approached us at a conference in Los Angeles regarding our BioMechaniks Division. His specialty is best classified as a conceptualist who toils on the realm of what is near-science-fiction inasmuch as it's manifestation is merely a result of present previsualisation. His practical engineering skills are also to be revered for were it not for our Tesla Generators blowing out, it would have been Sir Hauch's deft hands that would have saved Bertrand and I from becoming smeared throughout he infinite beyond a few weeks ago. Frederick Hauch is truly a chancellor among men.
Following the conference, Hauch took us on a tour of the city's finer nightclubs and introduced us to flocks of beautiful women. Under the California sun Hauch was our pupil, learning the ways of The Institute; but under the moon we were his, learning the finer art of modern courtship.
Now although any sort of feminine involvement or influence has been rare of late, Bertrand and I do not lead any sort of monastic life under the guise of science and progress. In fact he has been married twice before and I can assure you that things were quite risque during the early days of The Institute.

Coffee Machine

2006-08-16T13:40:00.000-04:00

Many months ago the coffee machine in The Institute's cafeteria underwent a quantum jump of sorts as a result of our experimentation with direct importation from the commodities traders that live within the Hollow Earth. While it is common knowledge amongst those in the know that coffee harvested within the terrestrial sphere of the Earth far exceeds the quality available from a surface harvest, transport has never been easy neither economically nor agriculturally as the polar access points present unique hazards.
Dr. Pufs' construction of a tunnel connecting The Institute with a primary waystation within the core was in a way blinded by our love of the brew itself. Harvested beans were roasted en route as they passed through the heated subsurface layers. Dr. Pufs is , along with the support of The Institute looking into branding possibilities for this private roast.

Bertrand's Folly

2006-08-01T13:39:00.000-04:00

According to my measurements I should now be 354 years old after jumping forwards and back in time during Bertrand's new EM field experiments, but I feel about the same as I did last month before we started the experiment and the whole time-slip began: just a tad nauseous. Unfortunately after such an adventure both physically and temporally, neither of us has much to report on the "wheres" and "whens" of our travels. Whether this is due to a cerebral instability or a lack of clean windows in the testing facility's experimentation pod, I cannot say for sure. What is obvious, is that we may only be back due to a crucial loss of power at The Institute. It seems as though we blew one of our Tesla generators out during the jump from 3500BC to 2013AD. Good luck for us that it crashed when it did since I do have a barbers appointment tomorrow.

EM issues continue

2006-07-15T13:38:00.000-04:00

The electromagnetic containment issues continue here. Our hope is that the elusive Frederick Hauch may hold some solution as the contents of the cryptic telegram he sent seems to indicate.

"Mr. Grundle:

I have reviewed your work. Your designs in the BioMetrix is amazing and forthcoming. I wonder if my visit to the estate will offer some inspiration for "human application" regarding the genu mEniskos. {I reference these images} I appreciate your time as my time has been limited by this terrible vex.

With my greatest regards,

Frederick Hauch"

EM Containment

2006-06-07T13:38:00.000-04:00

We remain (according to my best guess) within the Institute Labs deeply involved in Bertrand's EM Containment experiment. Temporal fine tuning is necessary, if only for the fact that Bertrand designed this contraption as a shield of sorts for use during the 2012 Event.

Communication Breakdown

2006-05-31T13:37:00.000-04:00

I have tried unsuccessfully over the past week to communicate with the web. My hopes are that at least one message gets out. Though if it does is that success or failure? Bertand's Electro-Magnetic Containment experiments can be intriguing; if not dangerous.

The Higher Physics of a Caffeine Addict

2006-05-24T13:35:00.000-04:00

The Institute has done research from time to time in the areas of audiology, musicology, and acoustics; especially in the areas of wave and/or particle study vis-a-vis our endeavors into quantum ordering and temporal shifting. On the recommendation of Dr. Pufs, I was introduced to the sonic experience of Q-T.
Whilst tinkering with a new LFO in hopes of creating an atomic fluctuation through subsonic distortion, Mr. QT grew increasingly weary and thus increased his caffeinated beverage intake. This increase in his alertness was not limited to sensory awareness or cognition, but was an increase in his temporal awareness, so that he spent less of his own time experiencing each moment and so widened his arc of what to him was "now." His atoms vibrated in such a way as to move both forward and backward in time simultaneously. His mind charged ever onward, a fraction of time ahead.
Ms. Mayberry has booked Dr. Pufs and I on the next flight to visit Mr. QT to verify and hopefully join in this most serendipitous discovery.

The Introduction of Dr. Pufs

2006-05-20T13:34:00.000-04:00

In early 1969 Bertrand met Dr. Pufs at a biomedical conference in London. To label Dr. Pufs a prodigy would be an understatement at best. At the tender age of sixteen, he approached us with his early concepts of biological enhancements that have since coalesced into our BioMechaniks group.

I must admit my initial reservations over bringing Pufs into the fold given his age. Bertrand, always at the ready to lambast humanity's temporal limitations, felt that age was no object and rightly so; for it was within the young mind of Cornelius Conrad Pufs that sprouted a unique amalgam of Egyptian wisdom and late Twentieth Century nanotechnology that will insure species survival through the 2012 Event.

The Board itself had numerous objections to adopting Pufs as our namesake. Of course the local presence of both a Bertrand Mueller Method Acting Workshop and The Grundle Wood Players Theater Group necessitated some differentiation on our part.

Some Origins of The Institute

2006-05-17T13:33:00.000-04:00

Bertrand and I were in University together when he (I dare not invoke "we") started The Institute. His penchant for arcane knowledge and experimentation was infectious for those around him but near damning for himself. Lucrative offers were dangled in front of him by many groups. The explorers, the theorists, the modern cyber-philosophers; they all wanted him, but failed to draw Bertrand with their golden carrots.

"Listen, MAG," I remember Bertrand saying, "it's the lines between it all that need to be drawn. I won't be locked away in a bubble. I'll thread those bubbles together."

And that's what we've tried to do. Though I admit most of the initial period in 1967 was spent designing the cafeteria.

A Little Bit of History

2006-05-15T13:32:00.000-04:00

A sketch by an old friend of Bertrand one fall evening in 1966 when he first conceived of The Institute.

My Mum

2006-05-12T13:36:00.000-04:00

According to the calendar in the Men's Lounge at the Institute, this Sunday is Mother's Day in America.

Elegant Elliott Smythe, the old bartender at the lounge was always current with politics, sport, world events and technology but for whatever reason stopped replacing the calendar above the bar sometime in the early 1970s. A loud challenge was raised by Bertrand one evening (or very early in the morning) to all present at the time to construct a functioning and legible perpetual calendar out of things that could only be found in the bar. Norris won by far, but his success owed more to his sobriety than ingenuity.

A Childhood Tale

2006-05-09T13:30:00.000-04:00

A significant amount of my childhood was spent in the upper rooms of my Uncle Felix's country estate. Several years ago I found that his home was no larger than those around, but as a young lad, it seemed a castle standing solid and protected by the dark forest on all sides. Uncle would send me and my brother upstairs to play while he entertained friends and acquaintances from the surrounding counties with lavish food and drink and tales of his adventures in the West (or the East depending on your orientation). We usually started by playing hide and seek during which I would inevitably succeed at locking my brother in one of the large storage chests lining the attic. Usually I let him out after a day or two, but once I did convince my parents that a ransom payment was required to insure the safe return of my brother, with me as the courier. And of course, no authorities involved.

Clive's Remedy

2006-05-07T13:30:00.000-04:00

Was my meal with Dr. Pufs meant to be my last? Were one to ask the Seared Scallops, their reply would have hinted at their desire to destroy me from the insides. My gracious host, Clive was awakened by my retching and proffered an old family remedy. In the darkness, I swallowed the medicine and clenched my teeth together as the briny liquid slid down my gullet. And a calmness followed. Clive laughed a low Englishman's laugh and bid me good-night as he closed the bathroom door behind him. I watched the stars float by through the window and tried to gather the courage to return to my bed.

Dinner With Dr. Pufs

2006-04-29T13:28:00.000-04:00

I have just had the pleasure of dining with Dr. Pufs of The Institute. Of course given the length of our acquaintance, a fine meal was nothing new. It was his announcement that was cause for celebration. He is heading a new Institute project in charge of comet impact prediction and investigation. I would explain further but I am bound by secrecy and am quite nauseous following the seared scallops with wasabi dijon.

Conference report

2006-04-27T13:26:00.000-04:00

The conference in Bern went as planned, despite the doubting minds of Bertrand and his meddling lot. I shall keep all involved of the updates.